All my dreams lately start with me doing something with great intentions. My heart is full and I am trying to do something for another person. Then the person gets angry at me because I am an inconvenience to them.
The dream then changes to where I am wandering in the woods. Everything is dark and damp and mushrooms are everywhere... So many different kinds of mushrooms and I am afraid to step on them because I can feel their life draining as I tread over the soil.
I feel like the ground is made of tiny strings of mushroom roots or fungus that has light flowing through it like blood through veins but it looks like tiny beads of water, on a delicate spider web moving, pulsing.
There are colors, vibrant. They mostly resemble traffic lights. Amber green and yellow but other colors accent around them, dancing. I stop moving. I let my heart slow and beat with the pulse. I take my shoes off and dig my feet into the cold dark soil. I can feel humming.
I can feel fast vibrations and high frequencies. The forest is all light. My arms reach out as green light erupts from my chest and out of my mouth. I can't feel my hands. I look and they are not there.
Then I realize I can move through the beads of light now in the web of roots.. but they don't just connect through soil. The air now is a light version of water, with particles I have never seen before. I can hear them in a whisper, a high pitched but soothing hum.
I travel in a instant to where the people I know are. I can feel their dense particles pass heavily through and over me. There is a smell of rotting and rancid meat in the air wherever they travel. Everyone I know is decomposing, releasing poisonous gas that emanates from them, killing all of the light that surrounds them.
Like tiny light bulbs bursting and crumbling to ashes as the air dies around them. The roots in the ground shrivel and dry. I watch their breath. It is as though it is simply out of sync... As though, to sync it alone with the pulse of all in existence, would cause less death of light.
The thoughts of every human on earth creates a dense wave like dropping boulders into a pond. The darker the thought, the more negative, the larger the . As the drops it crushes bulbs of light on impact through the air. Then like an atomic bomb creates a ground zero. It washes through the other humans and I see a strange mathematical equation as it spreads.
Math is no longer what I ever perceived it as. It becomes a simple probability matter. It makes perfect sense to me and numbers flow like a new language I have known since birth. The numbers show me pictures. The numbers paint elaborate maps.
I hear a song in the distance. One too familiar. One I never wanted to hear.
I am suddenly among the stars looking at earth, drifting further away. I have been called back to where I’m from. Earth is a dream I’m told not to worry about. No big deal. But It felt so real. Like a mission. It felt….
I look around and I am home. No hands. no feet, no breath. No heavy weight of the world, no one to worry about. Nothing to worry about.
I am at peace. Earth was just a dream… Or was it a nightmare? Or was it a failed mission? Either way I am at peace and I am home.
And then I wake up on earth.